Learning to Breathe

Relaxation doesn't come naturally to me. I thrive being on-the-go and busy; I like checking things off my to-do list. If there are tasks at hand, I can't sit down until it's all done. So I'm an efficient person, but not always a relaxed or rested one. My husband often has to force me to slow down. This is not a good trait.

The last few weeks I had been feeling pretty burt out. I'll be the first to admit my busyness is often of my own making. I like to be involved in lots of things and hate saying no... but I recently started supply teaching part time and so things were just getting to be a little "too much". I hadn't been sleeping well either...which generally happens when I have too much on my mind. Actually, come to think of it, I hadn't slept really really well (you know that refreshing, soul-restoring kind of sleep?) in probably a year. Having a baby ruined me for sleep! Even after Wesley started sleeping through the night, I was still waking up all the time! Anyway...

We just got back from a week in Cuba and I'm coming home feeling totally relaxed and refreshed and restored. I feel like this past week I really learned to relax. It's a conscious effort for me, to force myself to slow down, to breathe, to not be thinking about the next thing to do. But I could hear the waves and the palm leaves breathing slow, relaxed breaths, and I matched my breathing too theirs. I was able to soak up the sun, and swim, and rest, and read, and read some more (all with a toddler! I have a truly wonderful husband!). And sleep... lovely lovely sleep! I think it must have been the sunshine and the salty air, but I slept like I haven't in a long, long time. Sound asleep when my head hit the pillow and not awake until Wesley's happy babbling in the morning. It felt soooo good.

We had a fairly trying and long trip home with a teething toddler, but it didn't take away from the relaxtion of our trip. And today, I let myself move at a slower pace. Not racing like I normally might to get the suitcases unpacked and the laundry done... remembering to breathe. That's really been the Lord's word to me lately... "breathe"... to breathe in His Holy Spirit, to breathe life into myself and those around me. A deep breathe is so cleansing, so refreshing... and this week-long breath was just what I needed.